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Product details
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Audible Audiobook
Listening Length: 7 hours and 58 minutes
Program Type: Audiobook
Version: Unabridged
Publisher: Audible Studios
Audible.com Release Date: October 7, 2014
Language: English, English
ASIN: B00M8F7SK0
Amazon Best Sellers Rank:
This a book everyone in this nation - heck, in this world - should read and reread. I am a former district attorney and now a criminal defense attorney and I see people every day with many of these issues in their personalities. Forewarned is forearmed. Not reading and studying a book like this is like carrying a handgun without having any knowledge on how to use it. The predator section is especially telling. People -- when you are walking, get off the "smart" phone and take the earbuds or earphones off and look around and notice who is around you. The difference between being an unaware individual and being a sad media story may be only seconds.
A useful and worthwhile book that helps the "average" person to honor his or her instincts against those destructive people who often enter their lives. Wouldn't it be wonderful if we didn't need such survival guides, but the world is what it is, and it's better to be educated and prepared when these frightening predators and leeches come our way. Joe Navarro's experience as an FBI agent gives the book power and authenticity, and his co-author Toni Sciarra Poynter helps the writing to feel accessible, elegant, and informal. This isn't a clinical book which diagnoses illness and borderline personalities: it's instead a guide for those who encounter such problematical and often terrifying people, showing case studies and possible solutions to such entanglements. The checklists are thorough and some of the stories are disturbing, but that's the point. What comes across most clearly is that often (too often) we ignore our instincts against people who seem "off" to us, or who are irritating or bullying. The culture expects us to "get along," and often this means dismissing our gut-- which tells us frequently, "get away from this person." Navarro's book encourages readers to honor their feelings and to respect their conscience when they sense they are in a bad relationship, work environment, or unpleasant public encounter. There's a list of resources for those who have been abused or who are in peril in the back of the book, and the authors makes it a point to reinforce their important message: "It's NEVER okay for others to abuse, use, or harm you, and you have the right to call them on it, to escape, to call the police, or to tell them to stop." I don't think this book is only for those who have already suffered: it might help potential victims to recognize the warning signs of dangerous people BEFORE a crisis unfolds, and save themselves a lifetime of suffering, regret, or pain. Recommended.
It takes a little while for this book to get to the nitty-gritty and much of the advice may seem like common-sense, but I found it validating to hear an FBI profiler confirm the validity of paying attention to that little inner voice that sounds a warning when you're around certain people. The author includes the spectrum of toxic behaviors, from the lower level of annoying/upsetting personalities all the way up to the physically dangerous types. I've read elsewhere that psychopathic personalities are not all murderers or rapists -- the majority of them are not going to go to that level, but they are still dangerous in that they only care about themselves. Something like 4 in 100 people have traits that basically mean they dont truly care about anyone beyond themselves. These people will manipulate others to gain power & advantages for themselves, without any qualms. The author advises on how to assess someone's behaviors to help identify how dangerous they may be. He also gives advice on how to protect yourself. Much of it sounds like common-sense, but he validates the fact that you should trust your gut and find alliances, and expose bad behavior, rather than trying to downplay it. I found this book helpful, even though there is no easy answer for dealing with toxic people, no matter where they fall on the spectrum.
It gives you a list of 100 or so behaviors for each personality trait and ranks them at different levels so you know how to assess the risk level. For example, someone who has 10% of the personality doesn’t necessarily pose a risk. However, someone who has 60% is a big risk and one w 80% means you should run the opposite direction.
I bought this book hoping it would give me a better incite into the mind of criminals and other dangerous people. Instead it contains a lot of cliche observations that most adults have already made. Would be good for teenagers but not for adults.I had hoped that it would include incite from the authors time working with the FBI, however that is not the case. The author uses vague 3 sentence stories as an "I told you so". For example " stacys new husband bill was self centered and obsessed with his appearance. One day he ran off with all their money without telling her". Providing detailed stories with details allowing the reader to fully understand dangerous personalities would have been much more productive.I strongly recommend "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin De Becker if you actually want to learn how to deal with dangerous people
In an effort to understand what might be going on with a relative who got into serious trouble with the law, I bought this book. Thanks to it, I was able to come to terms with my relative’s serious flaws. Navarro keeps the description of the personality types simple and then presents lots of questions that help the reader evaluate the behavior of a given person. This book is practical to apply in real life and helps normal people to protect themselves from dangerous personalities. Easy to read, useful to use.
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